Friday, August 27, 2010

the dreaded "vulnerable" post for posterity.

Insert awesome family photo here.

Oops, Regret #1 for Adventures in Durban. I let myself get too stressed out at the ariport and missed out on getting a decent pic of the family. The worst part is how even I saw this coming, I always ruin the final moment.

So all I have of the little man and co is an underexposed photo of the parking lot, and I deserve that.

Speaking of regrets.... Excerpts from a tear-stained notebook entry written on the flight to London:

Everyone else seemed so thrilled to be leaving. But I have never been so loathe to leave Vancouver, so unbelievably sad. Ironic since this is exactly what I've wanted to be doing for the last 5 years.

Did I miss my window? Am I too old to be doing this now? Too penned in by my pleasant piles of social engagements and high heeled shoes? Or am I scared I'll be abandoned by the people I love as they buy houses and build families?

This is the litmus test. I have to love this experience, this work. Feel fulfilled by it. If not, well, I gave this career idea a go and can safely leave it behind. Settle in a city that I love, quit stalling, and carve out a life for myself there. And if I do find a place for me in this field, commit to it and don't look back. But no more looking at the other side of the fence, the path not taken. No more questioning my choices. I need to LIVE them.

But enough of my emo worrying. The hotel spa here is dope. Aleks says "Relax!"

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